Thursday, May 28, 2009

LOST OF TEMPER


I totally lost it today in the centre. I ask the kids to sit in their rows, and the 1st time I said it, only a few kids heard and follow the instruction. I thought I was too soft and I spoke louder and only half of of the people listened. And I said the third time and the fourth.

It was then when I could not take it and practically screamed at them. It was the first time I ever screamed with so much anger. I hardly or never screamed like that. At most I shouted. The usual calm and cool me was gone with a snap of fingers. These kids attitude was so bad. Is like they took me for nothing, ignored me as if I was air.

It shooked me so much that after the scolding, my palms suddenly went cold, and trembled slightly. Which, I have never experience before. Definitely shows how furious I was with them. And it the first time i cried in the centre. Friends whom known me, know that I hardly cry too. But today's incident was too much for me to take it. Normally, students who are rude to me, i still am able to take it. But, somehow, I could not tolerate it any long and i totally flare up to the extend that my palms are able to lose its heat.

But, my colleagues did talk to the children and they apologised. The moment they apologised, I felt like crying all over again.

Haiz... kids will always be kids and tomorrow they will be back to normal. I really do hope that they would start to appreciate me better, and start to respect me.

Thankfully, my colleagues supported me. And I'm glad that I am able to work with these wonderful people.

9:26 PM

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